I think the challenges that a heartbreak brings are underestimated.
We do not talk about it much.
Often well intentioned and caring friends and family will give us advice and try to cheer us up so we can get over it as soon as possible.
Breakups happen to anyone but that doesn’t make them less painful or challenging.
And we need to honour that.
Our resistance to feel the pain will make it even more painful. Denying our feelings of grief, sadness, anger, suicidal despair, fear, loneliness, anxiety about the future or getting distracted may seem to work in the short term but will make things worse in the long run.
What we resist persists- to try to push them away will only create more isolation and disconnection, which is counterproductive as it is in this time when your heart feels so torn apart when connection is most needed to heal.
Although time alone is necessary to heal, make sure you maintain some type of heart connection with someone and something outside you. It can be a good friend, a therapist, it can be your pet, nature, it can be a creative activity that makes you feel good. Embrace self-nourishing time but keep your heart open and give yourself permission to feel supported and held, having the courage to stretch outside your comfort zone of “having it all together”; asking for help and support is a gesture of extreme strength and wisdom.
This is a precious time to invest in yourself and incubate a new happier, more joyful and whole version of you.
If you are going through 💔, are struggling to cope with your emotions and need someone to talk to, just know that we can book a time to talk. Get in touch or go to the Heartbreak Support section on this website to know more. It is free with no strings attached.
You are doing this, and you are not alone ❤️
Photo by Bonnie Kittle